Well its almost a week since i started work its gettin better each day n im feelin much comfy wit ppl ard too but there is yet to come all the things im suppose to encounter.. hmmm these r wat my frends say abd f n b line but so far its kinda goin ok of cos i do still do mistakes but they seem to be kinda ok abt it hopefully they are.... Well this isnt the main thing which is happenin ard me.. im stuck as in i dunno i should move on n not care for once whom i loved alot or as he was my ex bf be there for him n be his fren..I cant move away from him at the same time i think by being with him its gonna make me feel depressed tat things didnt happened the way we want it to be.. i kinda have to talk to him like i aint interested.. but tats not how i really feel i do love answerin his phone calls n knowin he is alrite n i mean i still know he loves me as wat he says la.. i hope its true n not one of his lies again! I cant forget him for he is whom i put in alot of effort gave up principles of my own n also was able to forgive his mistakes nt once or twice but god knows how many times.. so he changing me this way can show how much he actually meant to me.. but guess noone knew especially his family i can tell tat none of them know how much i love him, they may think its their son who was crazy over me y cos he had to come report to her every little detail abt the both of us n of cos his part but nothin of mine even if it was our usual squabbles or major ones its always his side of his story which she knows... n y didnt i tell her mine cos i tot it was of no use.. u know y cos he was her darlin son she would do anythin for n knew nothing of wat her darlin son is capable of doing.. nothin abt gettin into fights nothin abt bein in a bloody gang nothin of havin gfs, but if somethin happens like he was charged for fightin in camp it wa san amusement for her.. she always supported her son i dun blame her she is his mother n she can be forgiving n giving him chances all his life! but im his gf n if im gonna live my life with someone like this will it make my life proper or will i be in tears all my life! I admit he was the sweetest n the most carin but when it comes to communication n understandin it was zero among us my language n his was totally diff... guess its jus meant to be n im never gonna have a gd relationship with anyone... so im giving up jus wait for the rite one to come n i guess i shall jus end up gettin married to him.. hahahaha lame me! Anyway im really tired n confused with all this... All this is cos of the questions he jus asked me will i be his fren always n be there for one another always.. Will i be able too?? I hope fpr everything to happen for the best la i wish my mum doesnt get to know all this...